My beautiful Paris Benjamin passed away on Thursday Oct 25th.  He was a tender 4 and 1/2 years old.

 

Paris was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy when he was only 1 and 1/2 years old.  His prognosis at the time was very poor, but a house filled with love and 7 faithfully-given medications kept him with us miraculously longer than his veterinarians and cardiologist dreamed physiologically possible. 

 

Our last night together was strangely like any other.  He leaped onto my parents' bed to get treats as usual with Grammy and Grampy, and later flopped on my bed when it was time for me to settle in.  But I awoke suddenly at quarter of 6 that morning when I heard soft but terrifying moans.  I jumped out of bed in a complete panic and found him lying in one of his usual sleeping spots on the floor next to my bed. 

 

I knew he was dying. 

 

I knelt by him, stroked him gently, and then watched him take his last breath.  It happened comfortingly yet painfully fast.

 

Paris was an amazing soul.  He learned to perform 14 tricks on command.  He would go to his room when asked, but would hiss on the way if he wasn't in the mood!  He would purr and chatter if I offered him "peas," then gobble them ravenously.  He would tilt and lower his head, and then flop on his side as a quirky greeting.  He'd paw at his water bowl, making the water ripple so he'd know how far to put his nose in.  He would leap into the linen closet and dig at the face cloths, smooshing them and scattering them onto the floor.  And, every once in a while when I was especially lucky, he would snuggle up on my chest in the middle of the night, my arm cradling his back, and simply purr. 

 

Even though I knew the day would come when I would lose my precious boy, I am still having a hard time believing that he's gone.  I still hear the bell jingle on his collar.  I still expect him to hop up onto my computer desk under my lamp - his special spot we call "Cancun."  

 

I will always love you, Paris Benjamin.  I was honored and proud to be your mommy.  And I miss you desperately.

 

"In my dreams
I’ll always see you soar
Above the sky.
In my heart
There'll always be a place
For you for all my life.
I’ll keep a part
Of you with me
And everywhere I am
There you’ll be."